Sacked.

So last Saturday, or rather I should say the Saturday before last Saturday..... my employment with Pizza Hut was terminated. I was sacked. Fired. Let go. Moved on involuntarily. See, we occasionally have performance appraisals. They are generally considered something of a joke. But my new boss found a handy use for them apparently. I was graded in several areas....And found wanting. The interesting thing to note is that some of these scores were adjusted under mysterious circumstances. I. E.....No real reason was given. I hated my job. I mean, let's not mince words I really loathed it. But I thought it was at least a long term hate. I hated my job, my job was indifferent to me....It was a relationship that disgusted me....Yet it sustained me at the same time. It was one of those..."Man, I can't believe how little I have going for me...At least I still have that crappy ass job though!" ...Situations.
I guess that's the part that really burns. The realization that I rode that sad sack into the ground. I didn't pull the ol' ejection seat lever, I rode that smoldering p.o.s. right into the tarmac.
A note to those of you out there who could make even a similar mistake: Do NOT ever take a job seriously that requires you to perform some sort of ritual, or set of tasks designated to you by an acronym. Because it means, that on some level, your job considers you to be a frikkin' idiot. Need an example? Righty-O! Do you have a C.H.A.M.P.S attitude? Because Pizza Hut does! C.H.A.M.P.S, you see, stands for Cleanliness, Hospitality, Accuracy, Maintenance, Production, and Speed. Someone was paid money to subject people to that. That's wrong.
To revisit, yet again what I was saying earlier though : I hated that job, I despised it, but in a strange way, I thought my job and I were partners in depravity. My job used me up slowly, like a malevolent hot dog rotisserie slowly squeezing me of my life's juices, and I let my job pay me money to do this. It wasn't what I'd call a great arrangement, but it was an arrangement. At times I felt like my job was kind of like my personal Moriarty, it would visit some kind of strangely eloquent horror upon me (like the Spanish customer who slowly and adamantly gave me their address every time I asked them their phone number or vice versa), but I was always prepared with an apathetic set of the shoulders or a sardonic grin. "Well played sir!", one of us would say with terse dignity.......
That aside, you can see how this outcome is something of a mixed blessing. Most of my friends all have what I consider good jobs right now.I never had a good job, I could only site my long stay at my last job as any sort of plus. Which of course is now moot, because I was fired. My boss cited what I consider to be some feather legged reasons for letting me go.....I could probably have even raised a stink....But it's done. I'm not gonna fight for that loathsome feeling to infuse me again. I have pushed the plate away. I've had my fill, thanks. My apologies if this post is news to anyone.......I really didn't want to give the whole "Golly, you know that job I've had for years that made me feel like a loser? I just got fired from it! I am a loser!" speech for awhile. I'm hopeful that I will find something.....Don't much care what it is as long as it isn't accompanied by a mandatory cheer.
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User Error

Today I opened the microwave, and stared into it crestfallen, not at all sure as to why I couldn't find my 2 liter of diet Cherry Pepsi inside it.